The Pneumatic Envelope Arbitration Council wrapped its proceedings yesterday with a dutiful round of hand-clapping, ending decades of rulings on stamp weights and flap angles that the 1923 Postal Aether Act had already rendered quaint. Champagne allocations from the city treasury continue without interruption.
Seven and a half miles of carbon duplicates linger in storage, still referenced whenever zeppelin routes require an argument. Guests lifted their glasses to salute the council's most ignored edict on mixing azure and lavender inks, prompting open laughter from the gallery.
Attendees asked for black-edged tubes in place of wreaths, recalling the 1921 tariff that once taxed lilies by the ounce. Sir Reginald Bumpersby, the last serving member, waved his arms in theatrical farewell before the valves shut for good.
Zeppelins scheduled for the seventh-anniversary circuit will drop commemorative tubes that may briefly fog the lower districts; the obsolete council, at least, will not be among the cargo.
