In a sudden move, the Fort Lee Film Commission terminated Transit Coordinator Brenda S. Line after actor Max Dewdrop arrived 47 minutes late, igniting protests from hundreds of performers and crew outside Palisades Studios. The internal memo cited her failure to meet 'heroic on-time quotas,' a phrase minted at last week’s seminar complete with speeches and a dance routine titled 'The Importance of Being Punctual.'
The incident has rattled Fort Lee’s film ambitions, which depend on reliable PATH service to ferry talent. Commission Chair Brad J. Filmpall clutched his prepared remarks and insisted no transit hiccup would derail production.
Geophysicist Dr. Mabel A. Lurkin argues that New Jersey’s 'aura of realism' deters California stars from relocating, an observation that has stalled the Commission’s proposed 'Pay-per-Path' scheme.
Commuter Larry T. Burnout, stranded once more, muttered that he might start carrying a script to navigate the new hierarchy of stardom over schedules.
