San Diego residents must now file 48-hour advance reservations through the county Cable Access Portal just to use a park-bench port. Cable shortages have turned quick coffee stops into 90-minute scrambles for open jacks.
Bill Plugman, a self-described Ethernet hobbyist, described the daily routine: "I first argue with the HOA over fluorescent reels to dodge tripping suits, then I reserve a slot like a table at a steakhouse." Analysts now track the reel-mile index as the new gauge of neighborhood output.
Oil at $100 a barrel has sharpened the scramble; even Starbucks saw a 12-person tangle at its curb outlet last week. One barista summed it up: "We might as well be running a black-market cappuccino connection."
